My Heart Is Tired(Rant) & Aidan's Hope

My heart is so tired. I've liked you since 6th grade- and I know you won't like me back. Ever.
I talk to you, tease you, think about you... all the time.

You are such a jerk to me and to my friends but something keeps drawing me back.
I don't want to like you... but unfortunatley, it's not an option.
Sometimes I just want to erase all memory of you, but that would stink because you are so cute and funny and I really like you. If I could choose not to like you... well I really don't know if I would.
It was just a crush that you might not even know about, but sometimes I cry about it. Just during the night I think about you and tears run down my cheeks and turn in to salt by my mouth.
You suck. So much.

(By the way the story I'm about to tell you is irrelevant to the one above. I just kind of wanted to get that out.)

This story is about Aidan, and Aidan's mom. Aidan's mom came to talk to us one day at morning assembly. We don't have a very big school- it is Preschool through 8th grade, but the largest grade probably has only a little over 50 kids. My grade only has a little over 30. So every morning, we all come into the gym/auditorium. Student council (that includes me) stands on the stage and passes aa microphone down a line. We lead the prayers, say the announcments, announce peoples birthdays, say the sports scores from the previous night, etc. Two groups of little kids come up- one sings "My Country 'Tis of The" and the other sings "Happy Birthday". It is a nice gathering of the whole school praying and I like it. My job then was to announce who's birthday it was (My position on student council was spirit commisioner, but now I am Vice President from the recent election.) Anyways, back to the story.

So Aidan's mom, I unfourtunaley forget her name, spoke to us about how her son Aidan had died. He had either died of disease, or it was unsterile hospital products, I think it was both. I again regret I don't remember all the details. She shared pictures of Aidan and told us a story about how Aidan asked what happens when you go to Heaven. His mother responded, "Sweetie, you become an angel." Aidan then said, "Angels are kind of girly. I want to be in a Spiderman costume when I go to Heaven." His mother had reasured him that he wouldn't have to worry about that for a long time. Sadly, she was wrong. Aidan past away when he was 5 years old, I believe. As I stood on the stage I realized I was sniffling back tears. How could this woman go on knowing that her son is gone? It seemed so sad. So when assembly was over, I walked with my friend Kathryn, as usual, since she was in student council too. I looked around, trying to find Aidan's mom. I spotted her talking to some of the elementry school teachers. I told Kathryn I would be right back. She asked me where I was going, and I told her I was just going to talk to Aidan's mom. I walked over and waited awkwardly until she was done talking with the teachers. I swallowed my nervousness and approached her. She was very pretty and thin for a mom, with beautiful blonde hair. I told her, "Thank you for talking." I then paused and added, "You're one of the bravest women I've ever met." I started sobbing during that sentence, and she hugged me. She too was crying. "You're one of the bravest kids I've ever met." She responded. "Not a lot of kids are willing to come up and make me cry." She looked at me with tear filled eyes and I suddenly felt really good about doig that. I went back and Kathryn wanted to know what I said to her. "Nothing." I said with a sniff. "I just... talked to her."
But she is one of the bravest women I know. And sometimes, when I'm trying to fall asleep, I think of little Aidan and his poor mom. And how anyone could go through the torture of losing their little child. And I just sob. It's so sad. And I pray for Aidan. And ask after reading this story, you do too. I hope he is in Heaven, wearing his Spiderman costume and impressing all the Angels. The thought makes me smile.
(P.S. On a happier note, I'm almost done typing A Star From the Sea, first chapter! Don't think it's soo long because it takes me a long time to type it. Nope. I just haven't got the time.)


I'm Baaaack!

Sorry for not posting for awhile. I was just on a very long weekend getaway with my best friends, Bridget and Katie. I would share pictures, but I didn't take any. Haha. But probably the highlight was boogeyboarding a long distance to a dock and pushing each other off. It was tons of fun. We also played a card game called Indian Head. You lick the back of a card and put it on your forehead, so you can't see it. You look at other peoples cards and bet based on theirs, even though you don't know what yours is. It was so much fun, and we were giggly because we each had a can of Coca-a-Cola. (:

Pretty Little Liars Chat!
Everyone (or at least everyone I know) is talking about it! There is a new episode tonight and I am watching last week's right now. I read the books, and they are pretty good. I think the show is alright, but all the events are scrambled, and it makes it seem like the four girls are best friends when they start getting messages from A, even though in the books they never really talked. And I find Spencer really awkward. Like when Emily came over to the group wearing the scarf Maya gave her and Spencer said "Hot scarf, Emily." It sounded so awkward. But overall I give it a 3 out of 5 stars. (P.S. Wren and Ezra are soo hot!)

And also you should get Tan Towels. I got them from Seophora and they are amazing. You rub this Clorox Wipe-like cloth all over and the next day, you are beautifully tan. But make sure you don't miss any spots. It says you should start looking tan in two hours, but I pretty much just notice it the next day. But you should get them if you are pale and find tanning boring, like me. I'd rather swim at the beach then waste my time and get skin cancer. No offence to others.



A Few Random Things For You!

Hey. It's Rach! I have a few random things to share with you.

Random Thing #1- Have you ever gotten that yucky feeling in your mouth after you ate something, but dont feel like brushing your teeth and getting that annoying minty after taste when you want to eat something again? Keep a box of baking soda in your bathroom. When you get that yucky feeling, pour some in your mouth, add water, and swish. After you spit it out, rinse your mouth. Your mouth with feel clean, but not minty. I love it! Also, when you brush your teeth, put some baking soda on top of your toothpaste. It will help make your teeth whiter. (:

Random Thing #2- Get Oven Break on your iTouch or iPhone. It's so much fun! You can get the Lite version, which I have, so it is free. It is a really fun game.

Random Thing #3- Get a Glogster account! It is so much fun! Especially DoodleToo (It's like AIM, but you draw pictures.) Mine is rach64xoxo. Friend me!

Random Thing #4-

Don't you NEED to see this? I sure do! I hope the video embedding works...



A Shout-Out to Hannah! Woot woot!

So Lisi's site still isn't letting me post. It's doing this:

Rach Says: Your comment is awaiting moderation.
June 15th, 2010 at 11:56 am
I don’t like waiting for moderation. Dx

It's never done that before! Why has it started now?

But anyways, the real reason for this blog post (see title) is for Hannah on Lisi's site! Why is Hannah getting a shout-out? Because she posteded this!!!

Hi, Lisi! If you read this, I want you to know that some of your readers are demanding a shout out to Justine, and if she got one, that would be good for her and I’m happy for her, but her comments have caused a lot of drama on her for you, and the fellow readers of this blog. I would also like to know any NEW details about the movie, if you have them, but i already know that Warner isn’t going to be making a movie for a while because of the economy. Now, is there any way that you can tell my fellow blah-g readers who are doing these ridiculous petitions? And I would also just like to take the time to thank you for your writing, blogging, and acknowleging other comments that matter and aren’t being repeated on this blog. I’m not going to demand anything else from you, other then that you continue to follow your passion of writing your great books, continue writing this blog, and stay true to who you are and what your morals are.Now, to my fellow Bloggers: Can we please stop with the petitions? I mean, Lisi is already trying to write her fantastic books for us, sacraficing sun, fun, family, and friends to write for us, so can we pleace cut her a break? I think that she would greatly appreciate it. And also, could you please not post the petitions? they take up so much extra space, and if Justine has been at this for as long as you all say and hasn’t heard anything, then one week of you “protesting” isn’t going to show much of a difference. I’m pretty sure that Lisi has bigger things to deal with, like due-dates, writing, adding her continuous spark to her books, and making her books amazing. If we could all just get back to NOT having drama, that would be greatly appreciated, by many. Thank you.

XD I love it!!! Perfect grammar and so polite, but I am also sick of this Justine thing. Kudos to you, Hannah. She also has a site: Love it.




Hey girls! Lots of stuff in this blog.

Okay I know I started working on A Star From the Sea a while ago but I am really busy so I am still typing up the first chapter. Sorry.

Also, on here and on Lisi's blah-g I am changing my nick name to Rach. My friends had given me the nick name Chella at the beginning of the year but I don't like it that much. So Rach it is. (:

Speaking of Lisi's blah-g, I posted on it speaking of my annoyances (is that a word?) about everyone freaking out about Justine's comment. I know I was a bit rude, and I'm sorry for that, but I was just stating my opinion. And your responses were just stating their opinions too. So I hope that any of my friends who didn't enjoy my comment and stated against it know we are still friends. It was just a clash of opinions and I don't think of anyone differently. No hard feelings?

Also, woo hoo! I have 10 followers! I know I should be happy, but please, if you follow, please comment! It would make my day! Thanks!(:



Embarrasing, but Good, I guess...

Hey! So have any of you guys read Tom Sawyer? Well, we had to read it for english class, and I liked it. But anyways, we had to do a project for Tom Sawyer, and we had a list of things we could do. I picked to write another chapter, as if the book were continued. I didn't think it was that great, but whatever. I handed it in.

So today I find out that my teacher absolutely LOVED my project and she read it to the other class and made them act it out. I mean, that is REALLY embarrassing! I am really self-councious about my writing (I wouldn't even let my best friend read my Tom Sawyer chapter, never mind read it to the whole class!). But I got an A+ on it, so that's good. Also some kid came up to me after school and he was like "Did you really write that chapter?" and I was like "Um...yes?" Haha. I guess my writing isn't half-bad. I thought it was terrible. This is what my teacher wrote on my paper:

I thought this was superb! You really took on the persona of each character. Kudos! Keep writing!

Will do, Mrs. P. Will do.




Hey! Soryy, I know I posted like 10 minutes ago, but, I have a new

You used to be able to find me at, but not anymore! Now I am Thank you!


Brick by Boring Brick

Do you know the song Brick by Boring Brick? Awesome song! I love it so much!

Well, as of today, finals are OVER!! So what is the point of still going to school, you may ask? Well, I have no idea. But I do know that no more studying for finals or homework means more blog time. And hopefully some more viewers or comments? Even if you don't have a blogger you can comment. So please start commenting?

By the way, some of Chapter One of A Star From the Sea is typed up, so I will be putting it up soon. It will be confusing, but it is all explained in the second chapter, which I still need to write. So keep tight, girls. I will be writing a lot more without the stress of homework, and hopefully finish over the summer. But I will probably not even be close. Haha.




Sorry. Another lame post. Still working on the first chapter of A Star From the Sea. So busy, and I have to go to a graduation party. Ugh. As you can see, I have a different title. I like it. (: Can I PLEASE get some comments? You can comment even if you don't have a blogger, so don't tell me you like my blog and not comment on it. Sorry, but it angers me. :(




Friend fights are the worst. I don't feel like posting much today... sorry.



Does anyone here care about Moby Dick? Didn't think so.

Ugh. I am ugh-ing because I have to do a project on Herman Melville, the guy who wrote Moby Dick. No one cares about Moby Dick. Sure it's a classic and I am sure it is a very good book, but why do I have to do a PROJECT on it? It's killing me. I'm dying.

Anyways what I wanted to talk to you about is this FABULOUS book I am reading called The Daughters. It is by Joanna Philbin. It is super new and the first of a series, and it is about the three best friends, Lizzie, Hudson, and Carina, who are all daughters of famous people. Joanna Phlibin can write this well because, well, HE-LLO? Her dad is Regis Philbin. Anyways I am in the middle of reading it and it is fantastic. I can pretty much guarentee you will love it and your friends will love you for showing it to them. (:



A Star from the Sea

Hey girls,
Just so you know, I got vice president for elections! Yay! Claps for myself!

And I ALSO wanted to let you know I have started re-writing A Star from the Sea, which I had been writing on my previous blog. I started re-writing today in my notebook because I was bored. Please be patient with me, I like to write all my stories before typing them, so I have to write then type one chapter at a time. I don't know why, but I just like writing it down before, than revising it when I type it.

Spotlight on Talia. Her story Sunday Pancakes makes me feel all bubbly inside because it is so good. Check it out at
Her blog is fantastic.



Liars,Origins, and Student Elections

Hey girliess.

So, have you guys read the Pretty Little Liars series? You have? Then do you know how EXTREMELY ADDICTING THEY ARE? AND HOW FRUSTRATING IT IS WHEN YOU DONT HAVE THE TIME OR MONEY TO GO TO THE BOOKSTORE AND GET THE NEXT ONE? I am be tortured here! I need to get Wicked, the next book. Honestly, I am dying here. Dying. And the thing that really stinks is when the Pretty Little Liars T.V. show premieres on ABC Family (Tuesday, June 8th) I will be at stinking class night, having to serve other people meals because they are graduating. Ugh! THE TORTURE! I mean, come on. It had to be that one night. I guess I will just have to stand with everyone knowing how wonderful that first episode was besides me and my friends, stuck eating pizza in a corner and watching the eighth grade chow down on an awesome meal that WE served them. Sigh. Class night sucks.

Well I decided for today I am going to tell you the origin of the title of this website.

Every Grain of Sand is from a wonderful song by Stereo Skyline called Heartbeat. Listen and love, please. (: The lines read:

For every grain of sand,

That you drew me pictures in,

There was one for everytime that my,

Heart dropped again.

And WALA! A beautiful title.

Moving on, student elections are tomorrow. It stinks because I have to give up my post as spirit comissioner, and someone else will take my job. The spirit commisioner student council position at our school includes promoting school spirit, and announcing who's birthday it is at morning assembly(We have a very small school. Haha.) Thus I am known as "the birthday girl." It is hard to give up my position as "birthday girl." Sniffle.
However, I am running for president and I have to make my speech. Oh my gosh I am so nervous! I don't think I'm going to win. Here is who is running:

Me (duh!) I've been trying to convince voters in the lower grades to vote for me. (:
This kid who is nice but not really popular.
Another kid who everyone thinks is either hilarious or annoying.
A girl who is popular but besides in her class not a lot of people are saying they are voting for her.

I was talking to the 2nd kid (nice but not really popular) today and he said he thought me and him would win. (President and Vice President) which is funny cause I thought we would both be the losers. Haha. The person with the second most votes gets Vice President by the way.

Also I am not a loser or nerd which it makes it sound like that I'm running for student council president. I am actually semi-popular, because I am friends with 2 popular girls. Just wanted to clear that up that I am not a total loser, I am a normal. Haha.
Oh I also have a DILEMMA. Dude okay so I have two friends.
Friend #1- Is in my class and we are best friends but only became so because we have a mutual best friend. She's really nice and my best friend! and she really wants to win and be Secretary for elections but I don't think she will take student council very seriously.
Friend #2- Is in the other class and we are pretty good friends. She was on student council with me this year and I know she would be a great secretary and take it seriously. She is wicked good at student council things and a really good student. However, I am not as good friends with her as with Friend #1.

Wish me luck for my elections. See you soon girls!!

(a.k.a. Rachel)


~New Writing~New Blog~New Post~

I'm baaaack.

Not in a creepy kind of way though. Haha.

You may know me from and writing "A Star from the Sea". The funny thing is I never ever finish any writing. I tell myself, I will finish this one, I will finish this one. But I never do. I had a mini-non-religious-epiphany today. I need to write something deeper, less supperficial and mainstream. Something dark yet realtable. I still need to figure out what, so it may be awhile before I actually start writing.

Anyways, so you see in my title I have a long list of "New"s (I wish I had a NEW immune system... ugh. Sick.) I am right now adding "New Blah-g", because that is what I am waiting for. Lisi's blah-g. Come back soon for more posts by me. Trust me, life for me is pretty exciting sometimes.